How I used to pick up boys in college...

I was going through old emails today and came accross this hilarious conversation I had with my mother on AIM on Friday, January 30, 2004, Enjoy!!

ME: i have a movie date er something on saturday lol
MY MOTHER: so how was your day?
MY MOTHER: uh-oh
ME: pretty ok i guess
ME: urs?
MY MOTHER: with whom
ME: with a guy from my tv broadcast class named justin
ME: hes a junior.. hes pretty cute
ME: bad taste in music tho and hes really into sports
MY MOTHER: oooo
MY MOTHER: give me all the details
ME: those were the details lol
ME: hes in my class but not in my group
ME: and today he came into the room i was in with a notebook
MY MOTHER: how did the date happen
ME: and i was bored so im like.. gimme ur notebook so i can draw all over it
MY MOTHER: and what did you draw
ME: lol... a squirrel frozen in a block of ice
MY MOTHER: OMG
MY MOTHER: lol
ME: HAHAHA
MY MOTHER: and that impressed him?
ME: and then i drew his name in block letters, an ice cream cone, uhm a multiple choice sentence about the class.. and i included my sn
MY MOTHER: sneaky...ky....ky....ky....ky....ky...ky
ME: JUSTIN: I was impressed by the wayward squirrel in my notebook, that was cute.
MY MOTHER: hahaha
ME: lol
MY MOTHER: it was the squirrel!
ME: squirrels work every time lol
MY MOTHER: hah
ME: O:-)

MY TRIP HOME

four days of sunshine, ten days of rain; baking a VERY LARGE cake shaped in a 5 and a 0; surprising my mother on her 50th birthday; going to walmart far too many times than i'd like to admit; mother's day eggplant parmesan; shopping with lindsay; calvin the beta fish; visiting nicole and talking for four hours straight; my cousin's graduation from the police academy; best friend foot and back massages; skateboarding; playing cranium (andrea and i won of course); grocery shopping at 2 am; bowling with andrea, justin, zac, my mom and donald; becoming the scrabble champ; fortune cookies; scanning loads of old photos; ice cream/art outing; babysitting my cousin's kids; ginormous rainbows; eating an obscene amount of utz pretzels.





















due to the crappy weather, i only took 15 polaroids (7 of which are utter garbage) and i bought a lot crap i don't need... like picture frames, fabric paint and more summer clothes.

movies watched: the letter, waitress, 13 going on 30, ghostbusters 2 and charade.

mom's visit, san diego and 3.5 celebrity crushes in 2 weeks

my mom visited me for 9 days. despite me being sick for the entire time, we had a lot of fun. here's what we did...

saturday: ate lunch with rick. took my mom to get coffee then my mom and i slept. a lot.

sunday: ate lunch with hal in santa monica then drove to san diego where we spent three days in mission bay. i took a lot of photos at pacific beach of and from crystal pier. it was neat to see the same area i was in for the first time four years ago. it's interesting how you perceive an area if you've only seen briefly and then to go back to the same area and see it from all sides -- you see it in a new light.

monday: we went kayaking in the ocean at la jolla and saw sea lions (we were probably were a little TOO close to them...) and leopard sharks and dolphins!! san diego feels like a state away from los angeles. actually, being in san diego feels a lot like being in florida or virginia beach. i really like it there. lots of awesome shops and restaurants along the main streets. there's more of a beach town vibe there than in venice or santa monica, maybe because the people in san diego seem more laid back and the traffic doesn't suck as badly.

monday night: we saw the foo fighters at SDSU!! :)

tuesday: we bypassed the gaslamp district because my mom isn't into shopping and went to midway to see the giant kissing statue and military ships. we ate lunch overlooking the bay and wandered over to the maritime museum gift shop (that is located on one of the ships). we stopped at the flower fields in carlsbad on our way back home but they weren't in bloom yet. however, the employees in the ticket booth still tried to get us to buy a ticket to see nothing for $5 (1/2 off ) and tried to convince us to buy a season pass to the fields. but who needs to see a field of flowers more than once??? i wonder if people actually buy season passes there.

wednesday: we saw the foo fighters again (night 1 at the forum!!) and my mom got to meet my boss james.

thursday: my mother, rick and i went to a taping of the craig ferguson show -- amy sedaris (one of my faves!!) was the guest. we ate sushi and walked around hollywood & highland.

friday: my mom got to meet my boss dave!! :) and we went back to hollywood. it should be noted that during my mom's visit, i beat her and rick at scrabble numerous times.

saturday: went to our favorite beach in malibu... but it was pretty windy and cold but we saw dolphins.

sunday: i begrudgingly went back to the beach and was glad i did because it was a beautiful, hot gorgeous day for the beach.

all and all, a fun time!! :D

last week also marked the end of my 3.5 celebrity crushes in 2 weeks spree...
1: nick hexum at the las vegas show 2/22
2: dr. drew at the celebrity rehab reunion show taping (look for me and rick in the audience!! the reruns are being shown on VH1 now) 2/25
3: DAVE GROHL x2!!!! 3/3 and 3/5
3.5: BONUS: amy sedaris at the craig ferguson taping, woo woo!! 3/6

Christmas and New Years

my generous, amazing boyfriend went above and beyond (waaaay beyond) this christmas and bought me my dream camera, a Canon 5D!! he even secretly contacted my boss dave to ask some questions about it. sneaky, sneaky. when i mentioned the gift to my mom, her face dropped... she was planning on buying me a Canon Rebel XTi because she didn't know rick was buying me a camera!! what an amazing mother and boyfriend i have. :)

this year i realized i enjoy christmas eve much more than christmas. there's just something more magical about christmas eve -- some sort of warm anticipation that's lost after it officially becomes christmas day. everything that has been decorated, purchased and planned suddenly becomes obsolete after christmas morning. i must have watched A Christmas Story at least four times on christmas. TBS should really just air the movie until 12 am december 26th, because i would have squeezed one or two more viewings after christmas dinner.

new years eve was a blast -- a dozen of us (me, my mom, my cousin, his fiancee, two of their friends, my best friend andrea and five friends from high school: zac, jess, scott, phil and his girlfriend jessica) all went out to eat chinese food at a restaurant my family has frequented since i was in 2nd grade. afterward we all went bowling -- a tradition we started last year.


my mom and i bought "bling rings" for all the girls and i brought along my infamous bag of fun.

the bowling alley supplied a lot of decorations too. everyone had a really great time. we used the coveted "strike necklace" again. (the prize you earn/lose each time someone gets a strike). each time it's passed, a photo is taken.





this year andrea wound up being the last recipient of the necklace which was long-deserved since she got robbed of it last year by justin who was the last bowler of the night. we were a very eclectic group -- some introductions were needed and it was the first time andrea and i had ever met phil's girlfriend (who was awesome... we totally approve, hehe) but everyone quickly became friends. being home made me miss my friends even more but knowing we can always pick up from where we left off reminds me how lucky i am to have such awesome friends. :)










HAPPY 2008!!!!

don't feel bad if our Christmas cards are better than yours.

so my mom and i ordered our Christmas cards tonight that we are sending to family and friends. we've never done this, but this year we opted to create the annoying picture-postcard kind.

here's the conversation we had. just TRY to guess our "theme," hahaha:

my mom: which one do you want to be?
jena: why?? are there going to be arrows pointing to who's who??
my mom: no, but in my head i'm thinking of who i wanna be...
me: which is susan serandon??
my mom: what?? no, you look more like geena davis...
me: well, i'm just asking. i dunno who's who!!

to help you visualize our holiday postcards: we uploaded a photo of the two of us on the Grand Canyon Skywalk. next to the photo, it says "May your Holiday Season be one Grand Adventure!" and underneath... "Love, Thelma & Louise." hahaha!! i love my mom!!

(feel free to reread the title again now... ;) hehehe).

10-12-07 stream of consciousness

i already ate breakfast but i go back to the fridge for two more almonds but two becomes four and four becomes six. and six becomes more pretzels. i crouch down and hug the cat, lifting her front feet off the floor so she's standing upright. "this is what it'd be like if you were a human," i whisper.

i want to reinvent my way of writing because i haven't written a worthwhile poem since i had to in college. i spend an embarrassing amount of time copying and pasting a stranger's fragmented thoughts into a word document and file it away for inspiration. unlike her i don't have the booze, the drugs or the crazy friends (nor do i want them) but i wish i could write like her. i know she thinks she can't write, but she can.

my editor (aka my grandmother) calls. "i think you meant 'secluded' but you put 'excluded'," she says. and she's right. my problem is i can't stay focused. there are too many things i want to create. poems, photos, jewelry, greeting cards, tee shirts. you name it. the dishes still aren't in the dishwasher that leaves soap crystals stuck to the the plates.

i edit photos and realize i haven't left the apartment today. i need to cash two checks and dust my bedroom. my best friend comes to visit in three days but i haven't spoken to her in two weeks. i turn a fisheye shot into an interesting double exposure, make it pink and green and title it "if malibu were a snow globe." a phrase that inspires a lovely shell of a poem in my head. if only i could write poems again.

it's fall and it's cold, but not as cold as it would be if i was home. (although my body is convinced there is no temperature difference today). i add dish soap to the dishwasher because the crystals don't work and we don't have anything else. five minutes pass and i'm scooping suds off the floor with a paper plate. swirly piles of foam fill the kitchen sink. the last time this happened was when i wanted the dishes to be "extra clean". miss gray meows for food. i shake the bowl and she thinks it's new. i wish i were that easy to please.

i'm eating the pretzel nuggets my grandmother mailed me yesterday which reminds me i have things to mail. my boyfriend calls. it's about the perfume i want that the store doesn't carry. so i have to find it online. my best friend calls. she's packing. it is supposed to be in the 70s while she's here so i told her to bring layers and 80s clothes. we're going out on thursday. "i have to pick out ice cream toppings and bake fifty cupcakes for sunday," she complains. she used to like making cupcakes. she's keeping an eye out for a new job because she's tired of dealing with a bitchy boss and coming home late and getting up early, but she loves the stockings and work clothes. (i hate the word pantyhose).

there's a washcloth pocked with mascara marks my mother draped over the tub. i'm hesitant to throw it in the laundry basket because time will make it seem like she hasn't been here in a week. she's home, living out of her suitcase and has a lunch date tomorrow but she doesn't know what to wear. it's either a striped long-sleeved sweater that she she bought me for Christmas one year or what she wore on Mother's Day.

it's nearly 7 now and we haven't eaten dinner yet. andrea was supposed to call me in an hour but an hour was hours ago. she's probably still packing. i'm eager to see the photos dave and his friend shot of me yesterday when i was wearing the pink wig that made me look like natalie portman in "closer." the wig was too kewl not to ask to borrow. my minds churning with ideas for halloween. we still need to buy candy. yesterday i was a model, tomorrow i am a PA, next week a beauty consultant. it's like halloween every day.

it looked like rain all afternoon and tonight it finally burst. there's still foam in the bottom of the dishwasher so i run it again on "light wash." next time i'll do them by hand. my boyfriend started calling the cat "PITA" (Pain In The Ass) and gets mad when i ask him to throw the asparagus into the steamer pot because the cat is comfy on my lap. after dinner, miss gray purrrs in his face and throws herself onto his lap and he forgets what a PITA she is.

it's almost 11 and i'm back on pretzels in front of the computer. two nights ago rick and i played scrabble online because we're too lazy to set it up in the living room but it took even longer to play. i take two nuggets out at a time, hoping they'll be the last two but two becomes four and four becomes six. we just finished watching the special features to "one flew over the cuckoo's nest." i never saw the movie in its entirety but i knew something happened to the Indian at the end. i remember my mother being happy with the outcome.

my bedroom is still dusty but the dog crate is finally out of the spare room. "why don't you read over here?" i ask my boyfriend who is still in the living room reading a Brian Wilson biography. i convince myself this is the last pretzel so he won't have to read over my pretzel crunching. there are new dishes in the sink and the cat box still smells but there's always tomorrow. i'm a procrastinator, but at least i'm consistent.

maybe tonight i'll fall asleep in our bed instead of the spare bed, convincing myself under clean sheets that i'll just lie down for two minutes. but two becomes four and four becomes six and pretty soon it's time for my boyfriend to crawl out of bed to turn off the lights, shut down the computer and return me to where i belong.

GRAND CANYON ROADTRIP

Oct. 1: packed up and drove 352 miles to Kingman, AZ. along the way, my mom and i fell in love with XM radio. we weren't aware of this, but our rental car was one of only four cars available with it. lucky us!! we found one alt. rock station named Lucy that we listened to the ENTIRE trip!! i think we only heard 4 or 5 songs ever repeated within the four days we listened.

once we arrived in Kingman, we attended the free beer/drinks/juice and popcorn event at our hotel. after browsing piles of brochures, we went out to eat Thai food (at the only thai restaurant within 32 miles). afterward, i bought a really kewl sterling silver ring at a gas station gift shop (around 9:30 pm). then i stood in the middle of the street to take photos of the Route 66 signs stenciled on the turning lanes. :) when we got back to our hotel, my mom and i watched the hills.

Oct. 2: woke up early, drove to the west rim to the Hualapai grand canyon skywalk. the drive there was actually a lot of fun... with a long segment of windy, bumpy "wash board" roads. there were also a lot of "cattle guards" sporatically dividing the streets. still amazes me that a thin grid prevents cattle from crossing their boundaries. and it was even more odd to see BULLS chilling on the side of the road without being fenced. and of course, i loved all the joshua trees. :)

the skywalk was pretty awesome - it's a glass horseshoe-shaped "bridge" suspended 40,000 feet above the grand canyon/colorado river. the first step was a little delicate but after we got over the fact that the floor is transparent, we were walking around like champs, even lying on our stomachs with our noses to the glass. each side of the skywalk is frosted [glass] so people who are afraid of heights don't actually crap their pants. it was hilarious to see people clinging to the railing and only walking on the frosted section. one Japanese man (there were hundreds there) inched past me and my mother during our photo opp and actually clung AROUND my mother who was leaning against the railing.

we spent all afternoon hiking around the west rim. on the way back there was a looong stretch of empty road surrounded by mountains, so my mom and i took A LOT of photos of us lying/jumping/standing/sitting in the middle of the road. (they came out awesome... you'll see them on flickr soon). there were houses nestled at the bottom on the mountain, in the middle of nowhere. no street lights. no trees. just desert. don't know if i'd ever want to live somewhere THAT secluded, but the view of the stars must be amazing. (and the lack of housing developments is majorly appealing). when we got back to town, we ate dinner at Dambar.

Oct. 3: my mom and explored what little there is to explore on "Beale Street" in Kingman. there was an abundance of antique and thrift stores, but a handful were closed. after seeing all there was to see, we drove 115 miles to Williams, AZ and stopped at a kewl general store/gift shop along the way on Route 66. only an hour and a half east, Williams was a lot greener and the weather was much cooler.

shortly after arriving in town, we drove 63 miles (1.5 hrs) to Grand Canyon National Park to explore the south rim. we spent a lot of time in the car, stopping at various view points, saw lots of wildlife, took lots of photos and caught a sunset... which was gorgeous. when we got back to Williams, we ate dinner at our hotel.

Oct. 4: woke up at the crack of dawn (4:30 am!!) to catch a sunrise over the grand canyon before heading back to california. little did i know my mother would have us hiking 4 miles around the rim trails. regardless of the sleep deprivation, we had a good time. on our way there, we saw three wild elk grazing alongside the road. we also returned a nice digital camera we found on a bench to the lost and found. had a huge LCD screen too. (such good Samaritans we are ;) hehe).

after our hike, we drove back to CA... only to get caught up in confusing car pool lanes that diverge onto other freeways and traffic. we had a lot to unload from the car which looked pretty lived in. after we were got settled in, we ate dinner at the apartment.

overall, a very FUN trip. :)

total miles traveled: 1,400
total number of postcards purchased: 10
total number of cameras i brought: 5
total number of photos taken: TBA (too many to count)

what we've done so far.

wednesday: went to a taping of the ellen show. my mom and i were on tv!! :) and everyone in the audience received season three of Grey's Anatomy. (mine's for sale on ebay because i don't watch the show). we saw ellen pull out of the parking lot AS SOON AS the show let out. she waved, but didn't stop like jay leno did. my mom and i still can't believe they make allll that money and only work 1 hour a day. i think i'm in the wrong profession. : P

on our way home, my mom and i stopped at Trader Joes (my mom wasn't impressed) and then headed to Whole Foods (bigger, better selection). we made tilapia and during dinner we watched The Pledge.

thursday: beautifully warm beach day!! hung out in malibu all afternoon. took lots of beachy photos (to be uploaded on flickr). saw a photo shoot Rachel Hunter (Rod Stewart's ex-wife). chatted with the AD. left my name and number with the photographer for possible future PA jobs - nice lady, but i highly doubt she'll ever call me.

aldo stopped by and ate dinner with me, my mom and rick. we watched Wild Hogs which was pretty funny. comedies usually aren't my thing though (unless they're from 1989-1999, like What about Bob? or Black Sheep). i beat my mom in scrabble AGAIN, hehe.

friday: rainy, dreary day. went to radio shack (to buy a camera charger for hal since the one rick ordered online wasn't advertised accurately). then my mom and i went to two estate sales, a yard sale, a vege/fruit stand, a gardening center, the food store and the bank. (busy afternoon!!) my mom bought an artist's (Bill Anton) print of a Marlboro-looking man with a horse. and i bought an odd statue of dogs dancing and some other knick-knacky stuff.

saturday: worked a cosmetic promo. met a nice guy named Lyndon who gave me lots and lots of shampoo and conditioner samples (in such cute little bottles!!) my mom booked all of our arizona reservations, went for a hike and lounged by the pool. she was itching to go to the Viper Room, but i wasn't too keen on the idea. i'm more of a homebody. here's how the convo went:

me: you should be glad your daughter would rather stay home and make crafts instead of going to the Viper Room!!
mom: no, YOU should be glad your mother would rather go to the Viper Room instead of staying home and watching Doris Day!!

(yes, i had checked out Pillow Talk from the library).

and then she called me a "deadhead."

we were also contemplating going to a local country western bar, but we went to PetSmart, made Roxie a dog tag, my mom bought cosmopolitan mix, we ate dinner and watched A Simple Plan instead. we're going to the Viper Room next week. :)

what we did to roxie in PetSmart:



plans for tomorrow: heading back to malibu. or going kyaking and visiting rick's parents. and packing. :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!

my b-day weekend...

saturday: i picked up my mom from the airport. :) and it was pouring. :( first time it rained in CA in a LOOOONG time (CA certainly needed it) but by the time we reached the apartment, the sun was shining. when we got to the apartment, there was a bday package waiting for me from lindsay. miss gray met my [mom's] dog roxie and hates her. poor roxie just goes about her business and miss gray actually stalks, chases and attacks her. after rick got home, we went food shopping but for dinner we ate in a local restaurant that has thee biggest, most widest variety of a menu. and we all passed out early that night.

sunday: my mother gave me my present in the morning. :) she had my dad's Valley Forge class ring made into a bracelet. it came out really nice!! my dad would have been impressed. (and i bet he's happy i'm wearing it).

later, my mom, rick, aldrin and i got all dressed up (i wasn't aware as to why at this point) and ate sushi in hollywood. which was nice because i've been craving california rolls!! then rick surprised me with tickets to Wicked. we had never seen it (except for aldrin who has seen it three times now!!) and it was really good.

monday: (my actual b-day) my mom had decorated the apartment with balloons and banners and gave me flowers and a b-day card full of lottery scratch-offs. then we went for a hike/walk with roxie.

after lunch, we went to a taping of The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. the guests were The Rock, Dennis Kucinich and Dinana Krall. we noticed former SNL cast member Victoria Jackson sitting a few rows diagonally behind us in the audience. we got to see Jay do the "Headlines" segment and *drumroll* afterward, we met him as he was leaving the studio and he signed an extra ticket we had and my mom took my photo with him. :)

on our way out of the studio, we were handed tickets to see Late Night with Carson Daly. (they needed more people to fill the audience). we accepted them, but remembered we don't even like Carson Daly... so we were no-shows.

when we got back to the apartment, rick gave me a star wars b-day card (yuck!!) and some pretty purple orchids. we watched Shooter and ate dinner. then we ate angel food cake with strawberries... Mmmmmm. all and all a very happy birthday!! :)

me wearing my new gnome pjs pants (part of a gift from my grandmother):

i feel so loved...
total # of birthday cards i received from my grandmother: 4!!
total # of happy birthday comments on my myspace: 6
total # of people who called to sing to me: 4 (plus mom and rick)
total # of "happy birthday" messages received on facebook: 24
thanks everyone!!!! :) :) :)

tomorrow: the new Foo Fighters cd comes out!! and my mom and i plan on lounging poolside and visiting a Chumash Native American museum. and wednesday, we're going to a taping of the Ellen show!! :)